New School of Marketing

How you can be a Mum and have a successful business with Renae O'Neill

August 22, 2023 Bianca McKenzie Season 9 Episode 137
New School of Marketing
How you can be a Mum and have a successful business with Renae O'Neill
Show Notes Transcript

In this jam-packed episode I speak with Renae O'Neill about being a mum and having a successful business. 

As I'm really only just starting the journey and Renae is further along in her motherhood journey I picked her brain on what's to come and got tips that I will no doubt implement along the way.

We spoke about:

  • Business in the early stages and how to best manage business and babies
  • Business with school aged kids
  • Mum guilt and what we can do to look after ourselves
  • Productivity hacks for when you're short on time
  • Planning for the unknown
  • and lots more wisdom for anyone who is managing business & babies/kids

Tune in to get all the tips 🎧

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Renae's productivity freebie
Instagram

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Bianca McKenzie:

Welcome to the New School of Marketing podcast, the place for smart, simple strategies that will amplify your business results, sharing practical tips, insider knowledge and actionable advice. Because marketing is something that every business owner can do. Now, let's get started. Introducing your host, Bianca Mackenzie. Mum, lover of snow, sports, camping, horse riding and in demand launch strategist and Facebook advertising knowledge bank. Welcome to the New School of Marketing podcast. I'm Bianca Mackenzie and today I'm talking about being a mum and having a successful business. Renee O'Neill. Renee O'Neill is a wife, mum of two, and a life and business coach for Mums. She has ten plus years of experience as a mum in business herself and has navigated her way to building a life and business she just loves. Renee is passionate about supporting mums to create and build a successful business on their terms. Putting motherhood first. Welcome to the podcast, Renee.

Renae O'Neill:

Oh, thank you so much for having me, Bianca. And thank you for that lovely introduction.

Bianca McKenzie:

Thanks for providing it. I love talking to you because I'm kind of just starting on well, not just starting on my motherhood and business journey. I had a business first and then motherhood, so I think a lot of people do it the other way around. They have the kids first and then start a business. So I think it's going to be a really interesting conversation.

Renae O'Neill:

Yes, I'm excited.

Bianca McKenzie:

All right, well, I've found that being a mum and being in business is quite challenging and I feel like a lot of people don't actually get it until they're in it. I definitely didn't. So I really want to talk to you about different stages of motherhood and business, mainly because you're already, like, a little bit ahead. What's coming? I want to know what's coming. So, yeah, I'd love to know your thoughts and your advice for someone in the early days of business or possibly thinking about starting a business and also looking after little kids, let's say the kids aren't at school yet. What would be your advice?

Renae O'Neill:

It's actually so interesting because it's always varied, where there are a lot of people I work with that have already started their business and then gone on to become a mom. And then, of course, you've got people who have become a mom and that's ignited this passion in them. And then they've wanted to create a business, and typically I find it's because they don't want to return to the job that they had or the career they once had, because they're wanting that time, flexibility and freedom. So it's always interesting. And I think, too, where you touched on the naivety we have about what motherhood is actually going to be like. And no one has a crystal ball, no one could possibly know what we're in for until we're in it. And I think sometimes that sudden change in what it's like to be a mom and have a business, it can be a lot. And it's almost like you step into a whole new identity and you're this whole new person that has all these added responsibilities that you've never had before. And so it's a lot like it is a lot. And I'm sure that if there's someone listening that's a mom, they're going to be like, yes, it really is a lot. And I think when you add business into the mix, it's a lot, there's a lot to navigate and I think we go through different transitions in motherhood and we go through different seasons and what's interesting is that plays out in business as well. And so sometimes we're kind of exploring a lot at the one time and it can be tricky to navigate and it can be challenging at times. And I think my biggest advice to somebody who is in the early days of wanting to start or they're new to business whilst also navigating mum life is don't wait. The biggest thing that I find when I'm talking to somebody who is a mum and they're wanting to start the business, I often hear them say they just want to wait until the kids get older. Once they reach school age, then I'll start. Or once I have left my part time job, then I'll start. There's all these I'll wait until moments and my biggest advice is don't wait. If you've got something you're passionate about, if you've got this drive in you for something more, then chase that. Yes, you might be in a season of motherhood that is demanding a lot from you and you might feel like you don't have a lot of capacity, but just start taking those little steps. It's amazing what you can do when you just do one small step at a time, what that can actually turn into and what it can actually become. So that would be my biggest advice. No matter what stage you're at, if you have that inkling to start, definitely just start.

Bianca McKenzie:

I love that. I really do love that. And yes, a lot of people do wait for the next, like, I'll wait until this, I'll wait until that, but then you're just waiting and someone else might run with that idea and that's fine, that's not a big deal because there's space for everyone. But, yeah, don't put your own life on hold. I definitely feel like that is a really good thing to tell other mums. So both you and I actually started our businesses while we were still working, so it was like a side hustle, right? I would love to dive a little bit into that as well because I don't know if you found that when you were working, you actually got more done.

Renae O'Neill:

Yeah.

Bianca McKenzie:

Let'S talk a little bit about productivity because when I was working, I almost feel like I got more done than I do now, but that's also because now I also have the kids and I have less, no, I don't have less hours. It's just different, isn't it?

Renae O'Neill:

Brain capacity different. Yes. And I think it's interesting because again, sometimes we hold ourselves back because we have kids, because we have the part time job or whatever it might be. And it's interesting because my situation is I've been in business for 15 plus years and so I've had different businesses in my time. I've had a bricks and mortar bridal store. I've just done a few different things in my time. I've been in business throughout the seasons of pre children, pregnancy, babies, toddlers, and now I've got two school age children. So I've kind of been through so many different transitions in my business journey. And I feel like one of the biggest realizations I had was two years ago I left my part time job to go all in on my business and I thought this is going to be incredible. I'm going to have school hours to work on my business, I'm going to get so much done, it's going to be amazing. And whilst all of that is kind of true, the biggest thing I noticed was I procrastinated more after I left that job and had more time available to me than when I was juggling little kids and the part time job and the business. And I think that's because when you know you only have this window of half an hour here or an hour there, you really get to work and you really get really intentional with your time and you do what you need to do in that time frame, because there is no time to fluff around. There is no time to Amanar. And I think one of the biggest things, especially in the business is we can distract ourselves with a million and one things. Like if we think about our business, there is always so much we could be doing if we wanted to. And I know one area that often becomes a procrastination. Minefield for me is canva. I could easily spend 3 hours trying to perfect the most perfect post when if I've only got a limited amount of time, I've just got to go with that'll do kind of situation. So it is interesting, sometimes I feel like when you have less time available to you, you're just really smart about how you're using that time. And when you have more time available to you, well, you've got that flexibility there, that room for movement where you can go well, probably do that tomorrow. So it is very interesting that perception of time. And it's really more about how you use your time than it is about how much time you actually have.

Bianca McKenzie:

I love that. And I'm literally sitting here nodding going yes, because yeah, I don't have as much time. But I do know that when I have very busy weeks, I seem to run out of time. But on the weeks where there's not much to do. I'm like, oh, what am I going to do now? We call it faffing in my little mastermind group. And I do faff a lot on those weeks. But that is also, I found the nice thing about having a job that you, in a way, are the driver of your own vehicle, of your own journey, and you decide what you're doing on those days, which I don't know, it comes back to that whole flexibility thing, right?

Renae O'Neill:

Absolutely. And I think for mums in particular, that is a big driving force behind our businesses. We've created these businesses out of that passion that we have, of course, but underlining all of that, it's also the time, flexibility and freedom that it allows us as mums. So when you get to that point of maybe returning to a job that you potentially don't want to return to, it allows you to go. Actually, I can work for myself and work around my kids or for me. I've got school age children, so I'm the mum that gets to pick them up and drop them off every day. So it's interesting, I feel like all us mums, we have that underlining similar why in our businesses as well.

Bianca McKenzie:

Yeah, I love that. I'd love to talk a bit more about the school years. I want to know what's coming. Sorry, there's a different motive here for me. So I have a kinder kid and a one year old at the moment, and coming from having worked well, it been in my business full time since 2017, and then obviously my daughter came along in 2018 and then I got a few more hours back again when she started going to daycare more often. And now with two, I kind of feel like I have, in a way, less like I had to go back again to less time, if that makes sense. And I love my work and I do love my kids as well. Of course I love them a bit, but work for me is almost like a little bit of an out sometimes. If I have a hard day, I'm like, I just wish I could just work sometimes. I don't resent my husband, but it's like, oh, he gets to go to work five days a week, I don't. So I do have those days as well. So I'm like, okay, what's coming with the school years? Because it's so conflicting that, yes, sometimes I wish I could just go to work five days a week and I didn't have to deal with the tantrums and asking to put the shoes on 20 times. Yeah. Tell me, does it get easier? Does it get harder? What's going to happen?

Renae O'Neill:

I mean, here's the thing, I really don't believe it gets necessarily easier, but it does in some regards. I think you've always met with different challenges along the way and I think it's more about the fact that you're just in a different season of life. And I think one of the hardest things for me personally I'll speak for myself is having to surrender to the season of life that I was in, especially in the earlier days, like when the kids weren't at school and having to go, okay, I have a different capacity right now available to me than I will in the future. And it's challenging. It is challenging because the reality and the harsh reality is when you have smaller children, they do demand a lot of your time, your attention, your energy, your focus. And that's just, I mean, I hate to say it, but it's just the harsh truth. It is more demanding and I think it can be really difficult, especially for you and others who've started businesses prior to having a family because you once had full capacity available where you could give your business everything. And often if you've started the business first, your business is actually your first baby. That was your first baby that you birthed, you created, you loved, you've nurtured, you've grown. And then your real babies have come along and all of a sudden you've got to now spread that amongst your business and your actual children. And so it just can be really challenging and I think reminding yourself that it's actually only temporary and look, as I say this, I know that this is easier now. I'm out of that stage and I've got the school age children, but the kids just grow up so fast. And I'm sure that if you can look to your child now or think about your children and you can go, wow, where has that time gone? I feel like I had them yesterday. It is so fast, it goes so fast and all of a sudden they'll be at school and my children are grade four and grade one now and I'm like, how has that happened? Like they started kinder yesterday, right? And so it's just a situation where sometimes I feel like we almost are wishing away the time because we're like, oh, it'll be so much easier when they start school. But then also it's really sad when that stage of motherhood is gone. Like for me, I'm past that now and now I'm the school mum and I'm almost like, oh I miss that, I miss that stage. And I think the biggest thing here is trying to find that happy medium, that harmony between the worlds. And I know it's not easy, but trying to find a way to enjoy the present moment and understanding and recognizing that this is the capacity I've got, I can still give my business the things I need to because I need that to continue growing. I want that to continue growing because it's an outlet that fulfills me, it's an outlet that provides an income for my family, but then also really enjoying that present moment with the children as well because honestly, they just grow up so fast and you look back and go, I really miss that now. Which I know when you're in the thick of it and you're having one of those days, you're probably thinking, no, I'm quite looking forward to these school years. But I think it's just remembering that it is only temporary and taking one step in front of another. Even if you're not getting done the things you'd like to in your business right now, know that you're still creating momentum, you're still moving the business forward, even if it's not at the level you want it to be right now. It will happen and it will come and you'll be glad that you've kind of persevered with it and persevered with the juggle along the way. But, yeah, it's not always easy and I think sometimes we just need to hear from someone else that it can be challenging and you're not alone in the juggle and feeling like some days it's a lot. So know that it gets better. And I guess looking at it from where I'm at now with school age children, things are very different for me. I have very strict boundaries around business time. I work purely school hours Monday to Friday and outside of that I'm I guess in mum mode with the kids, with the family, enjoying time on the weekends. But, yeah, things look very different now to what they once did many years ago.

Bianca McKenzie:

That's really good to hear. And yes, you're totally right about the whole it is a season. And everyone keeps reminding me that it is a season, that it isn't going to last. And we're going to talk a little bit about mum guilt as well. I go up and down between, yeah, okay, well, it is a season. I'm totally okay with that. I do love spending time with them. And like this afternoon, I'll pick my daughter up from school and then I take her to dancing. That's something that I wouldn't be able to do

if I was in a job until 05:

00. And I see some of her school friends at after school care. So my daughter goes to after school care two days a week by request. Like she wants to go. She doesn't have to go, but she wants to go. I'm like, okay, whatever. Go. And I see some of the kids just look really sad because I usually pick her up like an hour after she's gone there. Like, I still pick her up early and I see some of the kids looking really sad and I know some of them are there till really late and it reminds me that, yes, what I'm doing is the right thing for me. I am in this season. It is going to change. I do love that you said that. Yes, your birth of your business first. And it is like that my business is my baby. The other thing that I tend to struggle with is speed. I like speed, I don't like to just wait. And I think that's why I'm often in this juggle of like, yes, I love being with my kids and it is a season and on the other hand, it's like, oh my God, can it already hurry up? So sometimes that brings out the mum guilt. It's like, okay, dropping my kid off at daycare again, I don't really have to and then I remind myself, no, I do have to because if I have him at home, he'll be climbing all over the keyboard and that kind of thing. So let's talk about mum guilt because in our heads we know all the things, right, but we still feel it. So what do we do with mum guilt?

Renae O'Neill:

Yeah, mum guilt is such a big one and to be honest, I'm yet to meet a mum who hasn't experienced it yet because I feel like we all deal with it in one way, shape or form. And for some of us it might come in a bit thicker and heavier or we might go through different stages where we're hit with mum guilt. And I think the biggest thing that you can do when you're dealing with mum guilt is getting really clear on what your values are, getting really clear on what's most important to you. And this goes for life stuff, but also your business as well. And when you can get really crystal clear on what your values are, what your priorities are, what's most important to you, then you can start living your life and business in alignment and it just helps let go of some of that mum guilt. And so what I mean by that, for somebody who is juggling the business and the kids at the moment, it's like, okay, well, creating this business and having this business is really important to me because it does allow me that outlet to be creative, to feel fulfilled, to use my passions that I have. And it also means that it creates an income that supports my family as well. Your business might be the income that allows your family to go on holidays, which is something that's really important and then likewise working out what's important for you as a mum, what are your values as a mum, what's important to you as a mum. And again, coming back to a time perspective of things, it's more about quality over quantity as well. And so if you can get yourself to be really crystal clear on what's most important to you, you'll then be able to navigate business and mum life just a little bit differently. And it will mean that you have less guilt because when you are working in your business, for instance, you're not feeling consumed with guilt because you should in air quotation marks be spending that time with your children. Because you might know that when I finish what I'm doing in my business or when I knocked off at that time frame, so to speak, you know that you're then going to take your kids to the park or play a game with them or go and do something that you really love with them. And so when you get really clear on those values and those priorities and you start really living in alignment to them, that makes such a difference. I think also when it comes to mum guilt, it's also about not comparing to someone else. Everyone's priorities look different, everyone's values are different, everyone's life is different, everyone's business is different, their children, we're all very individual people with different needs and wants and desires and all those things, so we can never actually compare to someone else. And everyone's on their own journey, everyone's navigating their own challenges, their own seasons of life and business. And so really trying to not compare to someone else, because I feel like that can be such a trap for us, especially us mums. And we might turn to social media and see somebody who from the outside looking in is nailing it. They've got the business, they're managing the kids, their life is perfect on the outside looking at their social media, but the reality is we don't know what's going on behind the scenes. They could have a full time nanny, they could have a huge team in their business, everyone's just got different situations. So I think being cautious around comparing yourself to someone else because we need to stay in our own lane and run our own race and know that we're doing what we need to be doing, we're doing what suits us and that is just purely and simply different, person to person. So you really can never compare to someone else. Everyone's journey looks different, but I think also reminding yourself too that you're actually doing an incredible job, like honestly, being a mum, as they say, is one of the hardest jobs in the world and then you factor in running a business on top. They are two mammoth roles to be juggling at any one time. And so I think sometimes just reminding yourself what an incredible job you're actually doing and I don't think we as mums often enough, stop and actually recognize how well we're actually doing. We so easily go into the lack mindset of thinking like we're not doing enough, or we should be doing that or we should this, but no, let's strip all that back and go, actually, what am I doing good right now? What am I doing? Well and looking around and seeing all the things that you're creating, especially in the business sense as well. You are being a role model to your children, showing them what's possible in having your business. And, my gosh, our kids really are intuitive and they pick up on all the things they might see you working on your computer or taking that phone call or whatever it looks like to you in your world of business. And to them, they see that their mum is running this business and if she can do that, I can do what I want to be when I grow up as well. So I think remembering that, and again, that pat on the back is always needed. So if you've not given that to yourself today, I'm giving it to you. You are doing an incredible job.

Bianca McKenzie:

Yeah, I would agree with that and likewise to you as well, but yeah, it's so true, isn't it? We juggle so many things and business is one of the biggest personal development journeys I have ever been on. It is so much harder than going to work and just doing the thing that someone tells you to do. Yes, and then the whole motherhood journey on top of that as well. It is huge, it is just super challenging and I don't think the guilt will ever go away because I think it's part of being a human. Most of us will always struggle with some kind of am I doing enough, am I enough? And that kind of thing. But yeah, you are. And I do think that if you're doing the two things and you're only doing half kind of capacity, you're still ahead, you're doing a really good job because it is tricky and I love that you talked about values. I do think that is one of the most important things, and that will always bring you back to your own journey and not looking at what other people are doing. Because, yeah, like you said, social media. You'll see, one of my friends, they're traveling at the moment with their two kids, and it's like, oh, my God, that sounds amazing. And they're like, no, I do not want to take my 17 month old on an airplane anywhere at the moment. So, yeah, the photos look amazing, but I do know that behind the scenes is quite a different story.

Renae O'Neill:

Yeah. And sometimes we just need that reminder, right? Sometimes we just need that reminder that sometimes social media in particular is smokes and mirrors and there's always something behind that curtain that we may not necessarily know about.

Bianca McKenzie:

Yeah, I definitely agree with that. So tricky. I've stopped comparing myself long ago, it's like, nah, I know that it all looks good on social media. So let's talk a little bit about productivity. We've talked a little bit about it, but before we started this podcast we were talking about winter sickness and how it derails things every so often. So do you have any tips on planning for the unknown? Like sicknesses and things like that? And also sort of productivity hacks for when you don't have much time?

Renae O'Neill:

Yes, planning for sickness. We did talk about this before we went on air. And I think that's probably one of the hardest struggles, as well as a mum in business know, dealing and navigating with sickness, especially in winter. And down here in Tassie, where bianca and I are, it's pretty know, winter can be pretty rough down here, and especially when your children are littler. Even mine being school age, mine are primary school age. So we still are dealing with sickness. And typically speaking, when sickness hits a household mums, usually not always, but usually the one that will take the time off work and have the kids. And so it can be difficult to navigate that because we can't plan for sickness, right. Sickness just happens. We don't get to find out. Next Wednesday, be prepared at eleven we're going to have a vomit. It doesn't work that way. So I think the biggest thing that you can do for your business to allow for that flexibility that you need to when these things strike is to really set up your business in a way that can suit your lifestyle as a mum. And so what that looks like is creating systems and processes and automations in your business so that you don't have to be so hands on in your business. Yes, if you've got a VA or a team, you would have people you can turn to in those moments of sickness to go, hey, I need to be hands off the business for a couple of days, I've got sick kids, can you guys take over? But not everyone has that. Not everyone has that luxury of being at that stage of business. And so it is about creating these systems and processes and really in particular automations so that your business can run somewhat behind the scenes without you having to be there for every little step of the way. And so there are so many incredible systems you can have set up in your business that will help. But also I think it's about planning and scheduling your time that can allow for that flexibility. So one of my methods in how I plan and schedule my time is I am always kind of on alert, I suppose you would say, of potential situations that could arise. So I know that I can be flexible and move things around when I need to. And that also looks like scheduling things in advance for your business. In particular, I like to have my content scheduled in advance so that if I need to take a few days off because I'm sick or kids or whatever it might be, I know that I can have these things scheduled in the background, the business will be okay for a few days if I need to leave it. And that just takes the pressure off. It means that when you're navigating sickness, you can deal with what you need to and know that everything's running as it needs to in the business and you can come back to it when you've got more time to do so. So I think that's part of it. Now I do have some really good productivity hacks that really help. Because as we talked about before, it's really about quality over quantity. It's more about how you use your time more than how much time you have available to you. And so one of those productivity hacks is called Power Hour. Now you may or may not have heard of this already but this is honestly I think one of the best productivity hacks that there is. And as a mum in business I feel like you just need this. And so what this looks like is an hour of time that you set for yourself where you are incredibly focused on just that 1 hour and within that hour you will do whatever it is that you need to do. There might be set things that you do in this hour of time or it might just be an hour of time where you're playing catch up. And so I do this.

My Power Hour time is between seven and 08:

00 p.m. Of a night and it's every single day. Typically it's Monday to Friday really, but I will use that time to do a few things. It's not just all business related, it's also mum related.

So from 07:

00 my kids are in bed. They are not asleep but they are in bed. So I know that that hour of time will be pretty undistracted for me. I can put some headphones in, listen to a podcast or do whatever I need to do and I can get things done. So for me, my Power hour includes things like packing up the kitchen from after dinner. It might include folding the washing that I haven't had time for yet. It might be doing some cleaning jobs that I need to do, or it might be coming down to my home office here and doing some emails that I haven't had a chance to get to today or whatever it might look like. And honestly it is incredible at what you can achieve in just 1 hour of time. So I like to set my I've got like a Google home in my living room. So I set the timer for 1 hour and it's go time in that hour. Like phones down, no distractions, I'm just going and I get to the end of that 1 hour and think how the heck have I achieved all that in 1 hour when I might have scheduled 3 hours of time for the day and I haven't got nearly as much done. So again, it's about that being really strategic with your time and I actually have a free download on my website that you can check out for, it's like an audio that walks you through that exact process. My other productivity hack that I find really helpful in particular for us mums in business is creating your top three priorities for the day. Now again, this could be mum life, this could be business or a combination of the two. But I think when we sit down to do anything. Sometimes we can feel really overwhelmed because we have a lot on our plate. There are often so many different things that we need to do each and every day that that in itself can just feel so overwhelming. And so what I like to do is, yes, there might be 20 things that I need to do today, but I sit down and ask myself, if I could only achieve three things today, what would those three things be? And what I love about this is it makes me actually prioritize more strategically because, yes, I've got 20 things to do, but really, if I could only get three done, these are the three that stand out, these are the three most important things. And then I just focus on them only. And what happens, or tends to happen is I will achieve those three things and I'll then go on to do more. But it just means that it takes the overwhelm out of it and it also just helps you become really strategic around what is actually most important. And so that's one that really helps. And then the third and final one that I will give you, because I always love to listen to podcasts for the inspiration that you get, but it's always nice to have some tangible tips you can walk away and implement. But the third one is to not call your to do list a to do list. I think, again, coming back to the overwhelm, it just feels overwhelming to sit down and write a to do list like, these are all the things I have to do, these are all the things I need to do. It can just feel really overwhelming. And so what I like to call mine is mine's an accomplishment list. Because all of a sudden, just calling it an accomplishment list feels so much better. I feel like there's a shift in your body that almost happens when you call it an accomplishment list because it's like, yeah, these are things I'm going to get done. It just has such a different vibe about it. And so it's almost like a little mindset hack that you have as well. So they would be my favorite productivity hacks to share with you.

Bianca McKenzie:

I love it. Thank you. Interesting how you said what's like your top three, because it takes me back to when I was actually still working. I was using sort of like a weekly calendar thing and I always wrote down one thing for each day. I had all these things that I needed to do for my business, but I was working full time, so I always had what's one thing I can get done after hours, at nighttime, things like that. So I love the three things. And the three things totally could be business and home related, like mine always has. I want to have a shower. It just wakes me up, which that's an accomplishment when you have children, like little children being able to have a shower.

Renae O'Neill:

It absolutely is. Which is a bit of a joke because it's like that never would have been something you would have ever considered to be an accomplishment pre children. But when you've got little ones, being able to get that shower in is definitely a tick.

Bianca McKenzie:

Yes, definitely. It's like that's on my accomplishment list. It's like if I can get that, I'm done for the day. That's it. That's my one thing. I really love all of those tips. So useful. And I love the little mindset hack the accomplishment list. I'm going to try this Power Hour thing because I do the pomodoro thing where you do 25 minutes, but I do that with my mastermind buddies and we all hop on, zoom and we just set this timer and all of us are like co working in our own spaces. But that's 25 minutes. But I do like the power hour thing. I kind of do a little bit of it, but I don't set a timer. I tend to do the cleaning up the kitchen thing, but I'm sure that I can get other stuff done because I get distracted. It's like, oh, it's squirrel, that's interesting. And then my husband's like, have you looked at the time? We need to get kids ready for bed. So I'm going to do power hour. I think that's super useful and thank you also for all the tips around sickness and things like that because I do agree with you with having that flexibility, having the automations. Like, I have all of that set up, I have my three days. So three days when my kid goes to kinder is when my little one also goes to daycare. So I have my three days. I try to only schedule in client meetings on one day so that if something happens, like sickness, my husband will take that one day off. So the other days I will have the kids. And sometimes I get a bit annoyed because, yes, it tends to fall on us mums. But let's be honest, the kids also want mum. Especially my little one, he's still breastfeeding. So it's like my husband's kind of useless in that sense. Well, he's not useless, but yeah, he can't provide that way. So, yeah, I tend to schedule things on one day. Client meetings and things that can't be easily rescheduled. And then my husband looks after the kids and having automations and having things in place and you know what? This is something that I've only started to sort of really let sink in this year and allow myself to just go, you know what? If nothing gets done? Nothing gets done. If I'm just looking after the kids and I am not looking after my business for one day or a few days, it's not the end of the world. It's taken me this long.

Renae O'Neill:

Yeah, there's a lot of mindset shifts that usually have to occur, which when you're in a business setting, we're sort of in the setting of personal development too, aren't we? Like, we're working on ourselves as well. But yeah, sometimes it just takes us a minute to get to that place, doesn't it?

Bianca McKenzie:

It does. Well, especially when you've always worked well, when you work, someone else just kind of takes over. It doesn't really happen when you have your own business unless you have a team or a VA or things like that. But yeah, sometimes things just don't happen and that's okay. It's absolutely not the end of the world. And I am very lucky and grateful to work with clients who mostly also have children and completely understand that sometimes it just doesn't happen, at least not at the time that we want it to. And it's fine, no big deal. So, yeah, I think we just have to give ourselves some kindness and some grace and not be so hard on ourselves and it's not the end of the world if it doesn't happen. Of course, if you're in a medical field, it's different. But most of us when we're working from home and even ecommerce, like, if it doesn't get packed today and it gets packed and shipped the next day, and it does really break my heart when they have to deal with really not so nice customers that complain when they don't get it five minutes later. But in the grand scheme of things, not a big deal. I don't know, it's taken me this long to get to that. Okay, so do you have any parting wisdom for my listeners?

Renae O'Neill:

I think my parting wisdom will be that I truly believe that you can have the successful business that you want and also still be that present mum that you're wanting to be. And I think knowing that you are doing the very best you can and reminding yourself daily of what an incredible job you're doing. And I would take it as far as to write down at the end of every day the three things that you have done incredibly well for the day because I honestly just don't feel like we give ourselves enough recognition and credit for all that we do. And I also just think it's purely that we are so busy in our worlds that we don't even just stop to reflect on those things. And when you give yourself that time and space to go, oh, I've done a pretty good job today, I've achieved these things in my business. The kids are being fed, they're happy, I've spent some time with them, enjoying time with them. It's amazing all the things that you can actually give yourself a pat on the back for and I think you need to do that daily. So then when you have a day that feels a little more challenging than normal, you can pick yourself up a little bit better because you know that you're doing a really good job. And so I think, please do remind yourself of that. And if you need to rerecord this piece and use it as a pep.

Bianca McKenzie:

Talk, yes, I love it. I've actually started doing this with my kids well, with the five year old, not the one year old, but, yeah, I ask her, what was one thing that you really loved today? What was one thing you found tricky? And what's one thing you look forward to? And I chip in as well because she'll ask me about that. So, yeah, I sometimes share about what was something that went really well in my business. And I do think that I need to do the three things that went really well. Like, having that gratitude piece is super important.

Renae O'Neill:

Absolutely. And I think being able to bring your children into that as well, it's teaching them something really valuable as well, that they can think about all the good things that have happened out of their day. But plus, for you as a mum, if your kids have been at daycare or school, gives you a little insight into what their day has been like as well. So I do that with my kids every night as well. When I lay in bed with each of them on their own, I ask them, what are the three favorite things about your day today? And it's always so interesting what they share, especially my seven year old son. He will share things like, oh, such and such. Did a pop off in the class when we were all quiet and it was so funny. And you're like, oh, my gosh, yeah.

Bianca McKenzie:

My five year old would find that funny too.

Renae O'Neill:

Yeah.

Bianca McKenzie:

I think my one year old even finds it funny. He comments when we burnt or when any of that happens, I'm like, okay, nothing goes unnoticed in this house.

Renae O'Neill:

It's all hilarious for quite some time to come.

Bianca McKenzie:

Oh, great. That's good to know. Okay, two more questions that I always ask my podcast guests. What are you curious about right now?

Renae O'Neill:

Mine would actually be AI, because I'm fascinated by it. I'm fascinated in what direction it's going to take. But if I'm honest, I'm also a little scared, too. Like, I've been using a Touch of Chat GPT in my business because I find it's helpful to spark ideas or it can help zhuzh up the content. But what I'm not loving, if I'm going to be really honest here, is I'm on socials and I'm seeing a lot of people, I can tell they've copy and pasted from it. And so I'm not personally loving that aspect of it that I feel like, I don't know, I'm not sure how I feel about AI. So I'm curious about it because I can see that it's an incredible, useful tool that we can have, but I'm also scared of where it's taking us to. So that's what I'm curious about at the moment.

Bianca McKenzie:

Love it. Yeah, it's a little bit like it takes the personality out of it. I do like it because English is my second language and sometimes I put it in there, I'm like, oh, that sounds way nicer than the way it came out of my mouth.

Renae O'Neill:

And that's amazing. I think if you're using it in that way, perfect. And same with me, that's how I'm using it. But I'm seeing a lot of it's almost like you've gotten used to somebody's brand voice, the way they speak, the way they share content, and then I'm seeing such a big switch and it's almost like Chat GPT. Again, I don't know much about this stuff, but it's almost like that has its own tone of voice and so now I can see where people are copy and pasting, because I'm like, that's not how you would normally talk, that's not how you normally share. So it's like, oh, look, everyone's got to do what works for them. But I don't love seeing that because I'm like, I don't want people to lose their brand tonality and their voice and all those things because they're using AI.

Bianca McKenzie:

Yeah, you can train it to learn about your brand voice and stuff like that. I don't know exactly how it works, but yeah, I'm in a group with ads managers and we share that kind of stuff every so often. But you can train it for us. It doesn't really work as ad managers, because if we use it for ad copy for so many different brands, you can only teach it one brand voice. I tend to let it write something and then I go, can you write that but different, and give it better instructions? And then at some point I'm like, yeah, that's good enough, and now I'm going to rewrite it. That's usually how I use it, so it's more of sparking ideas and then I change it completely. Sometimes it helps write something that you didn't quite want. No, I didn't want that, but, hey, thanks. Now I've got some ideas.

Renae O'Neill:

It definitely takes some playing with and some adjusting, because I know that I put my sales page copy in for my group coaching program, Reset and Reignite. I copied it all and put it in there and was interested to see what it did because I was like, no, you've made it worse.

Bianca McKenzie:

Yeah, no, sometimes it doesn't do a very good job. It's really good at vision and mission statements, I have found, because I always struggle with those and it's really good at that. Oh, God. This is useful. But, yeah, it's ups and downs. I think it's good, but it's definitely good to be curious about it. I have not used any AI for images. That's like the next level kind of.

Renae O'Neill:

Scares me a little bit.

Bianca McKenzie:

I haven't used it for that, but we'll see what the world of AI is going to be like if you had an extra $5,000 in your marketing budget, what would you spend it on?

Renae O'Neill:

I would probably outsource and hire someone to come and do some SEO work on my website. This is an area that I have an understanding on. Not in depth though, but I just know how time consuming it would be to implement all the changes I'd need to on my website. But I also know how impactful it would be. It would be so worth it because to show up in the higher Google searches would be such a game changer. So yeah, I would probably work on SEO on my website.

Bianca McKenzie:

I like too familiar with it, but yeah, like you, I know enough, but not enough.

Renae O'Neill:

Yeah, I think it's just such a in depth topic.

Bianca McKenzie:

Yeah, definitely. At the moment it's on the bottom of my list, to be honest. Too many other things.

Renae O'Neill:

I've been the same though. Like, I've dabbled in it a little bit on my website, but not much. And so there's always moral priority, things that need to be done above and beyond that. So outsourcing it would be great.

Bianca McKenzie:

Well, we'll get there at some point. Well, that is the end of this week's show. If you have questions about building a thriving business and being a good mum, because you can have both. Definitely you can have both. Head to reneal.com. I will put all the links in the Show Notes also to the freebie that you have on your website, Renee. I'll put the link in the Show notes as well. Really big thanks for coming on the podcast. It was so good to oh, thank.

Renae O'Neill:

You so much for having me. I absolutely love getting to chat with you and I'm so lucky because we live local to each other, so I actually get to see you in person too.

Bianca McKenzie:

I know. So good. So good to be local. Awesome. Well, also thanks to you for listening. If you like the show, don't forget to subscribe and leave a five star rating and review on itunes, Stitcher, Spotify or wherever you heard the podcast. Your review will help others find the show and learn more about the amazing world of online marketing. And don't forget to check out the Show Notes for this episode@newschoolofmarketing.com where you can learn more about Renee, check out Useful links, download free resources and leave a comment about the show.